Unforgivable (Romantic Suspense) Read online

  “Do it.”

  Ten minutes later, Ben called. After she hung up with him, she said, “He’d been in the lobby in a quiet corner reading over his notes. I could hear people in the background.”

  Silas nodded, feeling relieved she wasn’t living with a killer. “Lock your door. I’m going to track down Harold and Gary.”

  “Silas…” She grabbed his arm this time. She looked windblown and scared. “What’s happening?”

  “I’ve got to track down the devil.”

  He stepped outside and became one with the dark.

  One part of his life was bleeding into the other. It wasn’t right, not at all. Separate, it was always to be kept separate. Divided completely.

  Now they knew about him, about this part of him anyway. They still didn’t know, couldn’t prove, that he was one and the same. No one would ever tie him to anything. They were too stupid to ever find out what happened to the bodies. Too stupid to find evidence to convict him. He was too smart to get caught.

  The first time the hunger had grabbed hold of him, he’d turned a date into rough sex. He’d learned quickly after getting his hand slapped—figuratively speaking. Either control his impulses or make sure they weren’t around to report him.

  The first time he’d killed, he’d been shocked. Repulsed even. And terrified. He’d been sure he’d get caught, but he hadn’t. The next time it went easier. That’s when he realized it: he was meant to do these things. That’s why he had the impulse.

  But things were getting messy. They’d connected the girls’ disappearances. He’d been so clever, too, making sure they were spaced apart in time and distance. Many of his crimes had been attributed to the girl running away or a run in with a random maniac. For so long, it had been perfect.

  They also knew about the shoes. That bothered him most. No longer his secret pleasure. How had they found that out? Only a couple of shoes had been found, and no one thought the murderer had left them there on purpose. Everyone in town was speculating about it. He’d overheard two of the deputies snickering about the guy masturbating over the shoe. He’d become a joke. Just hearing them had made his stomach churn. He wasn’t like that!

  He wasn’t sick. He just liked his pleasures in different ways than other men. He’d always been different. Special.

  He was going to show them just how stupid they were. How they were no match for him. He was living under their noses, yet they’d have nothing to pin on him. Even when he took one of their own.

  It was early, only ten-thirty. The road that ran by the edge of town was quiet. One truck came the other way. Far ahead two fuzzy red lights disappeared into the distance. And just off the side of the road, he saw what he was looking for, what he’d been waiting for.

  He deserved this. For everything he’d been through. For the disappointment he’d felt over the last girl. He’d tried to figure that out, why he’d felt empty after her death, empty and let down. Maybe she’d come too willingly. Maybe she’d died too quickly.

  He turned around and pulled to a stop by the girl who was walking home from the diner as always. He smiled. Geraldine. He liked her. Maybe this would give him the rush he needed, taking someone he knew.

  Something else piqued his interest: Geraldine was with a friend. He hadn’t seen her at first, because she was wearing black. Two women…risky. Different.

  He rolled down the window. “Geraldine, what are you doing walking way out here?”

  Beyond the swale and tall weeds that overtook the fence were the vast cotton fields her father farmed. He couldn’t see any sign of the house in the distance.

  Geraldine walked cautiously closer, then smiled. “Hey. Aw, we’re just talking. Dana’s got boy troubles.”

  He’d seen the other girl before, but didn’t know her. “Should you be walking out here by yourselves, what with those girls disappearing and all?”

  Her brown hair spilled over her shoulders when she braced herself on the door. “We heard about that. But it ain’t happened around here. And we’re being careful, walking away from the road and all.”

  “I’d hate for something to happen to you. Why don’t I give you both a ride home? Better to be safe than sorry, don’t you think?”

  Geraldine looked at Dana, who subtly shook her head. “We still got some talking to do,” she said. “But thanks anyway.”

  No matter how much success he’d achieved in his life, rejection still cut down to the raw tendons exposed during his early years. It brought back every person who’d ever turned away from him, every word that sliced into his soul, every time he’d reached out to someone and found no one there.

  He used that pain to interject hurt into his voice. “You don’t trust me, do you?”

  “Of course I do. We’re just not ready to go back is all.”

  “Good, I’m glad you trust me. Because I happen to know something about this man who’s taking women. Something that hasn’t been released to the public so they won’t panic.”

  Geraldine rested more comfortably in the open window. “Like what?” Dana walked up beside her.

  “Like he might be here in town. Now don’t go telling anyone yet. There’s more, but I can’t tell you yet.”

  In the dim light from the dashboard, he saw her easy expression darken. “Did they find that girl from Haddock?”

  “That’s the part I can’t tell you.”

  “They did, didn’t they?”

  He paused as one who knows inside information and must decide how much to part with. Then he gravely nodded. “It wasn’t pretty, either. He tortured her bad, raped her.”

  Geraldine glanced at Dana. “And they think he’s here? In Flatlands?” Her panic edged through.

  “Being involved in the investigation, I can tell you it’s a real possibility.” He splayed his hand on his chest. “I consider it my job to make sure you get home all right. I don’t want to hear tomorrow that you both disappeared, and here I could have saved you. I don’t want to see your pictures on missing posters.”

  Geraldine opened the door and slid onto the seat next to him.

  “I have a bunch of junk in the back, but I think you both can fit on the front seat.”

  After a hesitation, Dana slid in beside her and pulled the door closed. He let out a breath of relief. He’d already gotten himself into a lie he’d have trouble explaining if they hadn’t gotten in. Big mistake.

  The girls smelled sweet, a soft fragrance that was at odds with the curves beneath their blouses. He loved the anticipation, loved knowing he’d be privy to every curve on their bodies before long. Now that they were in his vehicle, he would soon have complete control over every aspect of their lives. Dreams about boys and makeup and college would be replaced with a nightmare they couldn’t begin to fathom. His palms got sweaty on the wheel just thinking about the surprise on their faces when it dawned on them.

  He pulled onto one of the roads that led to the cotton farm so he could turn around. “Where do you live, Dana?”

  “Possum Holler,” she answered after a pause.

  Where Katie used to live.

  Everything would change at the place where two roads converged. There was one lone light, blinking red. If someone saw him, he’d have to change plans. After all, he really had no business being there at that time. As soon as he went straight, the girls would know something was wrong. At first they’d protest, then he’d shut them up. By then he’d be driving so fast, no one would see into the vehicle at all.

  He smiled as the blinking light beckoned, casting a red glow on the black asphalt. Come closer, closer.

  What a marvel, that life could change in the blink of that light. In the distance, he saw headlights coming from the west. Too far away to see anything. He shot through the intersection.

  “Hey, wait!” Dana said, looking back. “Possum Holler is on 74.”

  “And you ran the red light,” Geraldine pointed out.

  He glanced over at them. No alarm. Dana looked concerned, nothing more.
Yet.

  “I thought it was out this way.”

  “I think I’d know where I lived,” she said with sarcasm.

  “Sorry. Guess I get disoriented out this way at night.”

  “You should know your way around this area,” Dana said.

  “You’d think.” He slowed down just a bit. “Let me look for a place to turn around.”

  “Right there—you were going too fast.”

  They passed another road that trailed off to the west. He slowed down a bit.

  “There’s a house up there,” Geraldine said, pointing at the cottage with the lights on inside.

  “I don’t like to turn around in people’s driveways when they’re that close to the road,” he said as he passed it. “I’d think it’d be unnerving to have someone pull up this time of the night.”

  “Maybe we could just do a U-ee in the road,” Dana said, searching for another turn-off. He suspected she was annoyed more than anything at this point.

  He gave them an easy laugh. “I’d be afraid another car would come by and hit us. Besides, it’s illegal. I take my responsibility to keep you safe very seriously. Don’t worry, we’ll find something up ahead. Go ahead, keep talking about boys or whatever you were discussing.”

  Dana rolled her eyes. “Yeah, right, with a man in the car?”

  “It’s just girl stuff,” Geraldine said.

  He kept slowing down so they’d think he was at least trying to find a turnaround spot. He already knew civilization thinned out from there. The forest grew thick on either side of the road for miles.

  “I know a road up here a ways. It’ll be a safe place to turn around.”

  He’d already unlatched the gate. When it was open, it blended into the vines surrounding it. All they’d see was the dark road leading to hell. Their hell, his heaven.

  He kept his eyes on the road ahead, but sensed their growing unease. He did nothing more to soothe them. When he saw his landmark, a state road sign next to a sign asking drivers not to litter, he slowed down.

  “Hang on, I’m going to swing around.”

  Dana grabbed the strap and Geraldine braced herself against the dash. He swung into the road that was barely discernable, especially at night. But he didn’t turn around. Before they even realized it, they’d plunged into the black opening of the forest.

  “Hey, where are you going?” Geraldine said, swiveling on the seat.

  “I’m turning around,” he said in a flat voice.

  He turned on the interior light, not wanting to miss a thing. The girls didn’t want to think the worst yet. No one did. Being taken against their will happened to other people.

  They were holding hands now…waiting. The barn came into view as he came to a stop. Dana was quicker than he thought, grabbing for the door handle.

  “Stop!” he said, pulling the gun from between the seat and the door with his left hand and snagging Geraldine’s arm with the other. “I hate when I have to shoot them right off the bat.”

  Reality dawned on them, freezing their faces and filling their eyes with disbelief and terror. The transformation, that’s what he loved. The utter and sweet control to turn their charming little lives into a nightmare. He enjoyed watching it happen, logging it into his memory for the future when the other side of him lived within the confines of the law.

  Two would be a challenge, he’d known that. He didn’t let go of the girl’s arm; the other girl he’d control with the gun. “Get out. Slowly. If you try to run, I’ll have to shoot you. If you cooperate, I’ll be easy on you.”

  “You’re not going to let us go, are you?” Geraldine whispered. “Because you won’t take the chance that we’ll turn you in.”

  She was smart. He slid across the seat, nudging her ahead of him and holding the gun to the other one. She looked ready to bolt, but her deer eyes shifted between the gun and the grip he had on her friend.

  “We’ll see.”

  Every step was a thrill as he readied himself for pleasure. He pushed them ahead of him into the building. It smelled musty, as it usually did. The girls huddled together against the far wall whimpering.

  What to do with two of them…he looked around the single room, then back to their huddling form. He pointed to one of them. “You, cuff her hands to the bed.”

  Their gazes went simultaneously to the bed. He’d left the cuffs there this time, and he enjoyed anew the terror blazing in their eyes. Both girls shook their heads.

  He walked closer to them, and they pushed close against the wall. He didn’t want to leave himself open by cuffing one of them himself while the other was free. He pressed the end of the gun to Geraldine’s cheek. “Cuff her.”

  She started crying. “Why are you doing this to me? I know you! I served you at the diner just the other day!”

  “You know one side of me. Now you’re going to get to know the other side.”

  Her sobs deepened. He gripped the back of her neck and shoved her toward the bed. She fell onto the lumpy mattress and curled into herself. The gun now pressed against Dana’s face. “Okay, you cuff her then.”

  He thought Geraldine would be more of a fighter. Dana was crying, but she was still looking for a way out. He saw the survivalist gleam in her eyes. She slowly walked to the bed. Her hand trembled when she took one of Geraldine’s wrists. Geraldine screamed and pulled back. Dana met his eyes, perhaps searching for a speck of mercy. That gleam dimmed, and she turned back to her friend.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered brokenly as she slid the cuff over her friend’s wrist and clamped it shut.

  The reality of that set Geraldine into a fit of screaming and thrashing. Dana shrunk back against the wall, pain wracking her features. He pointed the gun at her. “Cuff her other hand!” She slowly pushed away from the wall and approached her friend. Geraldine fought her, though Dana wasn’t trying too hard. He was tempted to shoot off a round to show the girls he meant business, but making that kind of sound was reserved only for a last ditch effort. The screaming, however, would go unnoticed, though it usually got to his nerves before long.

  He shoved Dana against the wall, grabbed Geraldine’s wrist and cuffed her himself. She continued to scream and thrash. He grabbed Dana next and cuffed her wrists to the foot rails. Both girls were at opposite ends of the bed. Both were screaming and kicking now, even kicking each other by accident.

  He jerked their shoes off, then the socks, and stuffed a sock in Dana’s mouth first. She bit him in the process, but luckily hadn’t drawn blood. He balled up the other sock and turned to Geraldine.

  Her voice was thick with fear and crying. “Why are you doing this? Why, why, why?”

  He smiled. “Because I want to.” And then he stuffed the sock in her mouth.

  He stood looking at them. Their feet were tied to the rails now, and their naked bodies overlapped. This should be a sweet moment, looking at what he now owned, knowing he could do whatever he wanted with them. Yet, something was lacking inside him again. He thought knowing his victims would give him a thrill. It left him cold as he took in the mix of hatred and fear on their faces.

  He’d made his first mistake, that’s what was wrong. He’d let his anger get the upper hand. As soon as someone realized they were missing, a massive search would ensue. A search he’d be part of. Naturally, he could be the one to cover this area, but he couldn’t take the chance of leaving the girls there. He would have to dispose of them now.

  What would Katie think if she knew? What if she were there right now, watching him? Maybe she would enjoy holding someone’s life in her hands, controlling them completely. He pictured her sitting there, but the picture turned to Katie cuffed to the bed rails.

  If she knew…would she understand? Could she forgive him his sins?

  Silas had seen the two young, naked bodies on the bed, one secured to the foot rail and one to the head rail. He’d seen the butterfly tattoo on one girl’s shoulder. He knew her, had seen that fresh face before. Geraldine. God, this had to stop. Fla
shes had bombarded his brain like gunfire: the two girls, their terror, that road that disappeared into the woods. Accompanying the flashes were the feelings, the anticipation, the pleasure at their terror. He touched them, tortured them with his violation, and terrified them with the way he enjoyed their distress. Everything came in vivid detail, overtaking his own senses.

  He hadn’t killed them yet.

  Silas always tried to follow it at first, trying to find the clues that would show him where the girls were. He held on for as long as he could, until the images overwhelmed his brain and blacked him out. It hadn’t gone as far this time. He’d only just begun the games.

  When Silas woke, it was still dark. He wasn’t in his vehicle. He blinked to get his bearings, rubbing his hands over his face. Something sticky transferred from his hands to his face. He couldn’t see anything. The moon was blotted out by thick clouds. He touched the tip of his tongue to his hand. Blood.

  He jerked to his feet and stumbled before catching his balance. As his vision tuned in to the dark, he saw a highway that disappeared into the night. He was standing a few yards from it, wildflowers and weeds up to his knees.

  The Navigator was farther down in the swale, its nose end buried in the bushes. He started to run his hand over his face in exasperation, but remembered the blood.

  Where the hell had it come from?

  It was too dark to see himself, but he dimly became aware of a throbbing pain in his arm. More sticky stuff covered his arm. He yanked off his shirt and wrapped it around his arm. As his mind cleared, he remembered the shoe. He nearly stumbled as he made his way to his vehicle. The engine wasn’t running. He pulled out a flashlight and started searching the area.

  He found an old milk carton, three beer bottles, and an old, dirty diaper before finding it. A glittery pink Scetchers sneaker with a thick heel. It was wet, so wet it glistened in the light. He searched the highway again, though whoever had thrown this here was long gone.

  Or was he?

  He shuddered at the thought. Charles Swenson had changed him that awful day, there was no doubt about that. But how much?