Woke Up Dead Page 10

  He ducked his head. “Are you finished?”

  She mirrored his action. “For now.”

  He nodded. “I thought about everything you just mentioned.”

  “And it doesn’t matter to you?”

  “It doesn’t matter.”

  She reached out and touched his arm, causing a strange tingling sensation beneath her fingers. “Sam, promise me you won’t make this kind of decision in haste. You know you love this agency. Pretty soon the pain will go away and things will look different. Just give it a few months.”

  He looked down at where she held his arm. Her touch had never felt like that before. She interpreted his look as hands-off and removed her hand. He almost felt like telling her to go ahead and put it back, but he re-thought that one and put a skeptical look on his face.

  “That’s all you want from me? Just to give this a few months?” Somehow that didn’t seem so hard. If he had to admit it, the thought of working for his buddy wasn’t changing his outlook one bit. He’d already made the commitment, though.

  She nodded. “You don’t even have to take on my case.”

  “Aw, you gotta want something. This just isn’t like you, Maxine.”

  She lifted her hands. “I don’t. Promise.”

  “Well, I’ll think about it.”

  Then she smiled, pulling her lower lip up between her teeth the way Jennie sometimes did. He turned away for a moment, and when he looked back at her, the smile was gone. Maybe he’d only imagined it.

  They stood there for a few awkward moments, and he didn’t know what else to say to her. Finally he thought of something. “Did you tell the doctor about the disappearing Coca Cola drips or the paranoia you’ve been experiencing since the accident?”

  She wrinkled her nose in a way that made her look incredibly cute. “No, I didn’t tell him any of that.”

  “I figured.”

  She remained there, looking at him with the strangest expression on her face. Like a deep melancholy.

  “Maxine, is there something wrong with your life?”

  His question jarred that expression. “No, why?”

  “Seems like you have everything you ever wanted. You’re marrying a rich guy, got a beautiful, if strange, home to live in, even a maid. Why are you so interested in fixing my life all of a sudden?”

  She gave him a tentative smile. “Don’t you want me around?”

  “No. That’s why we got divorced in the first place. Neither of us wanted the other around all that much.”

  Her fingers tightened on the strap of her big purse. “I thought we were still friends,” she said in a small voice that gripped him by the throat.

  Aw, when had he gone soft with Maxine? “Hell, Maxine, we were never friends to begin with.” After a moment, he added, “Okay, we can still be friends. Now will you stop bugging me about my life?”

  “That’s what friends are for.”

  “Real friends let you live your life the way you want. They don’t try to fix you or change you.”

  “Even if it’s for your own good?”

  “Especially if it’s for your own good.”

  Again they lapsed into that awkward silence. Hell, he’d never had any trouble talking to her before. Even when their marriage was failing, they’d always had plenty to say to each other.

  She glanced down at her shoes, then back up at him. “Well, I guess I’d better get going.”

  “Good luck with your investigation.”

  “Thanks.”

  She hesitated a moment before turning and walking out the door. He stared after her for a while, wondering if he wasn’t the one who was delusional. He rubbed his arm where he still felt remnants of her touch. That was probably the last he’d hear of her. Except maybe the picture in the paper, bride and groom. Hopefully she wouldn’t take this friend thing too far and invite him to the wedding. He’d probably get her a wedding present anyway, just to show her no hard feelings, but he sure as heck wasn’t going to attend. Because, no matter what he’d agreed to, they could never be friends.

  CHAPTER 5

  EVEN though their conversation went all right, Maxine left the building feeling blue. She wanted to walk back in and talk to him some more, but they’d run out of things to say. He’d made it clear that he didn’t want her to touch him. Why was it so complicated? It was never this hard when they worked together.

  Well, of course, things were different. He hadn’t looked at Jennie as anything more than a friend and coworker. Maybe there was a reason for that. Maybe whatever it was in her soul that made her who she was didn’t appeal to Sam. Inside this new body, she felt more confident, more of a woman. Could it be that she just wasn’t enough for Sam either way?

  She shook her head as she crossed the street to her car. It didn’t matter—she wasn’t giving up on him. Too much was at stake. She glanced up at the window next to her desk. Maxine-the-first had given up on him. She’d let him go. How could any woman let Sam go? He was warm and considerate and open—or at least he had been with Jennie. How could Maxine-the-first not been his friend? His friendship had meant so much to Jennie, she wouldn’t have risked it for anything. Now, as Maxine, she would risk it all to make Sam love her. She just had a few layers of old hurts and time to peel away first.

  Maxine made the familiar drive to the apartment building she’d lived in for two years. The ground floor was tailored for people in wheelchairs by the man who owned it. Because Rick was also in a wheelchair, he saw the need for housing to accommodate those with special needs.

  She started to pull into the apartment’s slot, then realized she didn’t live there anymore. She maneuvered into one of the guest slots instead. It felt strange to be back, walking up the ramp to the front door. She no longer belonged there. But Gabrielle was her friend, and that was one part of Jennie’s life she couldn’t just cut away. She rang the doorbell.

  Gabrielle opened the door a minute later, a suspicious look in her eyes. Maxine couldn’t see much of her beyond the five inch space the chain allowed. She smiled, glad to see another familiar face she cared about.

  “Hi, my name is Maxine.”

  “Whatever you’re selling, I’m not interested.” She started to close the door.

  “Gabby, wait! I’m a…friend of Jennie’s. I need to talk to you.”

  Gabby hesitated, her face going expressionless. Maxine went on. “I knew her for a long time. She lived here with you, and you were one of her closest friends. You’re the only one I can talk to about this.”

  Gabby’s distrust was etched all over her pretty face, a distrust she had good reason to harbor. She relented and finally closed the door and reopened it without the chain. She rolled out of the way, and Maxine walked inside. It looked the same as it always had, and yet it looked vastly different. She felt so…tall. Everything here was made for someone in a chair. The island in the kitchen still had the rack of copper pots hanging above it, the large rack of spices and the pantry filled with baking goodies. Even this modest kitchen made her fingers itch to create something edible, as she had many times.

  “You said you needed to talk to me,” Gabby said in a voice that leaked impatience. She was still the prettiest girl Maxine had ever known. She had sea green eyes and a perfect complexion. Her straight brown hair was long, except for the wispy bangs over her forehead.

  It was so hard to sidestep around Sam. She didn’t want to do that with Gabby. Maxine turned with a nervous smile, pressing her palms together. “Gabby, it’s me. Jennie.”

  Gabby’s expression hardly changed at all. Except that her lip twitched. “This isn’t funny.”

  Maxine knelt down beside her. “I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s true. When I died during the fall down the stairs, I went—I don’t know, someplace. Then this voice said I was getting a second chance, and I woke up outside Sam’s office. I thought it was in my own body, but it wasn’t. I came back in Maxine’s body. This body.”

  Gabby’s face went white. “This is creepy.
I don’t know who you are or what you’re up to, but I want you to leave. Now. Or I’ll press the panic button.”

  Maxine took a quick breath. “I used to drive you crazy on the weekends by waiting until I watched the cooking shows before telling you what we were having for dinner. You loved my chocolate éclairs. You always blamed me if you got a pimple, but you never turned down anything I made with chocolate. I used to envy you because you’re so poised and so pretty, but maybe you didn’t know that. You sometimes have nightmares about your ex-boyfriend’s attack. I’d wheel into your room and wake you up and hold your hand until you stopped crying.”

  Gabby’s face went even whiter. “You can’t know all these things. No one knows about the nightmares.”

  “Except me. It was our secret. It still is.”

  Maxine went on while she had a line. “Our other secret was how I felt about Sam. You used to lecture me about telling him how I felt. I was afraid to lose our friendship, so I never did. I was never as daring and confident as you, Gabby. I was afraid to take the risk.”

  “Because your mother overprotected you,” Gabby said in a whisper, her eyes moving over her face, searching.

  “Yes. You were teaching me to be more confident.”

  “And you were teaching me not to be so bitchy about being in a wheelchair.” Gabby took a deep breath, her eyes wide. “Jennie, is that really you?”

  Maxine leaned forward and hugged her. “It’s me. I don’t know why, but I got a second chance. I think it has to do with Sam. Because I never told him how I felt. When I was dying, all I felt was regret at not telling him. At not being what he needed.” She waved her hands over herself. “And now I am.”

  “You’ve talked to him?”

  “Yes.” She decided not to get into the whole flower box incident or Maxine’s death. She stood, her legs aching from crouching. “I tried to hire him, but he’s closing his business. He blames himself for my death.”

  “But you told him you’re still here.”

  “No. Don’t give me that look, Gabby. I want Jennie to stay dead. She was dull, self-conscious. If I tell Sam I’m Jennie, then I’ll feel like Jennie. I want Sam to see me as a new person, and I want to see myself as a new person. Only there’s, ah, one little hitch. I’m his ex-wife.” Maxine realized she felt awkward looking down at Gabby. Was that how people felt around her? She sat down at one of the two chairs at the kitchen table.

  “I can’t believe this. I can’t believe you’re here, that we’re talking like this.” Gabby’s eyes widened. “You came back as his ex-wife?”

  Maxine nodded. “Not that I’m complaining. It just makes things more complicated. That and my rich fiancé.”

  “You have a fiancé?”

  “Maxine-the-first did. Does. That’s what I call her, Maxine-the-first. This fiancé is very…interesting, but I want Sam. So I have to break it off with Armand, the fiancé, and put it back on with Sam.”

  “Wait a minute. What about this Maxine person? What happened to her?”

  Maxine held her mouth in a tight line. “She died. I wasn’t going to get into this, but I think she was murdered. That’s why I want to hire Sam. Maxine was going to him in the first place. She was scared, I think. I want Sam to find out who did her in. I’m pretty sure it was Armand’s son, James. I keep thinking that if I walk away from Armand, it’ll go away, but I also want to find out who killed Maxine. I owe it to her, you know.”

  Gabby sat there, hands demurely folded in her lap. “Do you know how crazy all this sounds?”

  Maxine nodded. “I could go on Oprah with this.”

  Gabby laughed. “You could do the whole talk show circuit.” Her expression sobered. “What about the first Maxine’s life? I mean, you can’t just walk away from an entire life. What about her friends? Her family?”

  “I’m not here for them. I’m here for Sam.”

  “I know that, Jennie, but it’s not fair to the other people in her life.”

  Maxine wasn’t there to talk about the other Maxine’s life. She wanted affirmation that her decision was right. “Well, for one thing, Armand seemed to be her life. She’d moved in with him a few weeks ago. They’re—we’re supposed to be getting married in two months. I can’t keep him in my life.” She rolled her eyes, thinking of the way Sam did that. “I don’t want to keep him in my life. I found out that Maxine had a decorating business, but she closed it down when Armand proposed. Apparently she wanted to be a lady of leisure for a while. She’d planned to make the man her entire life. Right now I have no home and no job.”

  “What about family?”

  Maxine shrugged. “I don’t know. I mean, I can’t just ask Armand or Sam whether or not I have family.” She took Gabby’s hands in her own. “You see, it’s perfect. Yes, I feel bad about dumping Armand, but I have a sneaking suspicion Maxine-the-first was only marrying him for the life he could give her. James called me a gold digger. Armand will be better off without me.”

  Gabby merely shook her head. “I don’t believe this.”

  “It’s a little hard for me to take, too, but I’m doing okay. I’m being so rude. How are you doing?”

  Gabby’s mouth twisted, which constituted a shrug. “I’m all right. Same as always. Except for feeling awful that my best friend died.”

  “And she’s still dead.”

  “Jennie—Maxine, why do you want her to be dead? You know, she wasn’t that bad of a person. She was sweet, honest…” She threw up her hands. “What am I saying? You are sweet and honest. And you are still Jennie.”

  “I don’t want to be Jennie anymore. I want a new life.” She squeezed Gabby’s hand. “But I’d still like you in it.”

  Gabby smiled. “I’d like to be in it. Once I get used to all this.”

  “Did you get a new roommate?”

  “No. I can manage on my own.”

  “Gabby, don’t shut yourself in.” Gabby’s accident—as they referred to it—had only happened two years ago. She’d had much less time to adapt than Jennie had.

  “That’s easy for you to say. What happened to you was an accident. What happened to me—”

  “I know,” Maxine cut in, knowing how painful it was for Gabby to talk about it.

  “You don’t live in fear, wondering if the man who took away your life is going to return to finish the job. I feel safer here in my apartment with my alarm.”

  “He’s probably not going to come after you here. Don’t let him take from you more than he already has. You can be careful without becoming a shut-in.”

  After a moment, the brittleness from Gabby’s face disappeared, and she smiled. “Here we are, arguing and giving advice as usual. You sure sound like the Jennie I knew.”

  “Okay, I still am, in a way, but I want to be different, too. I want to be exciting, daring, confident.”

  “Confidence comes from within, you know.”

  “I’m still working on that. I’ve hardly had a chance to get used to this new body.”

  “What was the first thing you did when you realized you could walk?” Gabby asked, a wistful expression on her face.

  “Actually, I fell down. Don’t laugh. I’ve been in a wheelchair for so long, I had to reprogram my brain for walking. I was all wobbly.” She grimaced. “I still am, but I’m getting more used to it. The first thing I wanted to do was dance. It was so romantic. Sam was holding me—because I’d lost my balance—and I asked him to dance with me. That was what I dreamed about the entire time I was in the wheelchair. I wanted to dance.”

  “Did he dance with you?”

  “He thought I was nuts. But he will. See, I am getting more confident. Going up the stairs was my biggest thrill so far. A whole flight of them, and I was able to walk right up and down. No elevator. I just did it.”

  “Now I’m jealous of you. If I could walk again, I’d give Claudia Schiffer and Elle MacPherson something to worry about. I don’t think they’re very threatened by my hands.”

  Gabby had been an up-and-comi
ng model before the accident. Sometimes she still modeled, if only her hands or face were needed. She had the prettiest hands Maxine had ever seen. She gathered those hands in her own.

  “Gabby, I want your opinion. Sam blames himself for my death. He tried to grab my hand as I fell, but he couldn’t get a hold on me. I know he’ll get over that. He probably feels sad about my dying, but he’ll get over that, too. We were only friends. I want to start fresh with him. Well, not completely fresh, as it turns out. But he hasn’t seen Maxine-the-first in two years, and that was only lunch. I’ve changed a lot. Am I doing the wrong thing?”

  Gabby tilted her head. “Aw, Jennie, I don’t know. It’s not something I’ve ever read about in Dear Abby, that’s for sure. Do you feel right about it?”

  “Yes, very right.”

  “Then I don’t see anything wrong with it. Either way, he’s lost somebody. Jennie was closer to him. Here’s another way to think about it. This happened to me, anyway. When I became…paralyzed, my life changed. Who I was changed. It was like getting a whole new identity, new friends, everything. What’s so different about that compared to this?”

  Maxine gave Gabby a harder hug. “I never thought about it that way. Thank you so much. That’s exactly what happened to me, too. Your old friends feel awkward around you. They don’t know how to relate to you anymore. After a while, you don’t want to be around people who knew you as you were.”

  A peppy knock made Maxine stand as Gabby went to the door. The owner of the building, Rick, wheeled in with his high-speed chair. “So Gabby, are you going with me to the arcade?” He stopped and looked up at Maxine with surprise. “Oh, I didn’t know you had anyone here.”

  Maxine stepped forward and held out her hand. “I’m Maxine, an old friend of Gabby’s.”

  Rick took her hand. “Nice to meet you. I’m Rick.” He looked a bit like a magical elf, with red hair and beard, and a twinkle in his eyes. Rick had been in a wheelchair for most of his thirty-odd years, after an accident had left his legs malformed. He’d also had a crush on Gabby since they’d moved in.